Hands off.
As discussion on the best way to raise and discipline children continues to evolve, a leading expert is underscoring the devastating dangers of corporal punishment.
“Parenting is hard, and most parents are doing the best they can with the tools they were given,” mother, pediatrician, and parenting expert Dr. Isha Mannering told The Post.
“Many were spanked as children and sincerely believe it is the right way to teach, correct, or keep a child safe.”
Still, she says her stance on spanking or any other form of physical discipline is a hard no.
“While it may result in compliance in the moment, it does so through fear rather than teaching the deeper skills children actually need, like self-regulation or sound judgment,” she said.
Recent research reveals that 15% of parents still believe spanking is “necessary” to raise a child, and a 2026 study found that a large swath of Gen Z and millennial parents still use spanking as a form of punishment
For many parents, the practice is the product of cultural normalization, i.e., ‘I was spanked and turned out fine.’
For others, the choice to spank reflects stress, isolation and a lack of practical alternatives that feel effective in real time.
“These parents are not necessarily choosing between good and bad parenting. They are choosing between familiar and unfamiliar tools under stress.”
Mannering shared that many parents confuse the immediate fear-born silence and obedience that often comes from spanking with long-term behavioral success or family progress.
“A child who stops a certain behavior because they are scared may learn to avoid punishment, but they may not learn why the behavior was wrong, how to repair it or what to do differently next time.”
And experts strongly suggest that spanking is not the best way to support a child’s development.
A 2021 study found that children who are spanked at age 3 are more likely to be violent and disruptive at age 5, with observed behavior including destroying their own belongings, displaying cruelty to peers and authority figures and physically attacking others.
“Physical disciplinary measures can normalize physical force as a response to frustration or conflict,” explained Mannering.
Harmed children can also become harmful adults.
A 2017 study found that children who are spanked are more likely to become violent with a romantic partner later in life. For this and other reasons, the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) and the World Health Organization (WHO) have both taken a clear stance against spanking.
Mannering told The Post that spanking can also create negative emotional patterns that can last a lifetime, including creating an “insecure attachment” that can lead to broken romantic relationships and loner tendencies.
“Secure attachment develops when a child experiences a caregiver as a reliable source of safety, comfort, and regulation. When that same caregiver is also a source of fear or pain, it can make that sense of safety more complicated, even in a loving relationship.”
She cited a 2020 study that found physical discipline undermines the parent-child bond and expressly recommends non-violent forms of behavioral correction.
From a clinical and developmental perspective, Mannering says no amount of physical force is “safe” or appropriate for children, even if it doesn’t have a lasting physical effect.
“When pain becomes the method of discipline,” she said, “the deeper lesson can be lost.”
Indeed, according to a 2021 review, physical punishment is consistently associated with an increase in behavioral problems over time.
Researchers said the findings held regardless of whether the parent or guardian used otherwise “positive” parenting tactics. And, perhaps more notably, the study also revealed that parents who used physical punishment demonstrated increasingly violent and erratic behavior over time.
At least 69 countries have legally abolished all corporal punishment of children.
Though publicly frowned upon, as of 2024, spanking is legal in all 50 US states, and 15 states have laws that allow corporal punishment in schools.
Still, Mannering believes the practice is on the decline thanks to a broader cultural emphasis on emotional health and growing awareness of the outcomes of physical discipline.
“More parents are asking, ‘What is this teaching my child over time?’ rather than simply, ‘Did this stop the behavior?’”
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