‘Chivalry is dead’: What men just aren’t doing anymore

Is Chivalry dead? After a grown man practically trampled me to get on the bus recently, I’d be inclined to say yes.

He was in a suit and fun socks (boring finance bros tend to think quirky socks make them look fun), and he was on the verge of elbowing me to get a seat.

I was unnerved by his rugby scrum approach to public transport, it was a bit much for 8 a.m. and buses come every 10 minutes – but I wasn’t shocked

It wasn’t very chivalrous, but is that even a thing anymore? Is men letting women go first on public transport a dead concept?

Did it die when we started advocating for fair pay and the rights to our bodies? Is the price of equality that men just aren’t that polite anymore?

I want equal pay and men to follow the Titanic rule of women and children first.

Not that you’re asking for a history lesson, but to catch you up, the word chivalry originated in the Middle Ages, and primarily referred to the code of conduct for knights.

In modern times, it refers to being polite and showing kind, respectful behavior, usually towards women.

Such as holding the door open, allowing women to enter rooms first, and men offering to give up their seats on public transport.

Does that still exist in 2025 though? Or is it a social normal we’ve outgrown?

When news.com.au hit Sydney’s streets to get answers, the response was fairly divided by gender.

In general, men claimed chivalry still exists, and most women admitted they didn’t see enough of it anymore – if at all.

“I definitely think chivalry is dead. I think the attitude of men in general just isn’t great,” one woman proclaimed.

“I think so yeah. I don’t see it as often as I should,” another woman echoed.

One young woman in a funky hat said she didn’t think it was dead but conceded it is definitely “changing.”

What does chivalry look like to her in 2025? Well, less holding open on doors, and more making someone a Spotify playlist.

Men, on the other hand, think chivalry is still a thing.

“I think it is still there and I think it should still exist,” one young man argued, but then admitted that it had morphed.

“Compared to how our parents saw it, it is not where it used to be,” he added.

Meanwhile, two young men responded with a firm and concise “no” when asked if they thought chivalry was dead.

There were also quite a few men that declined to be filmed that admitted they thought chivalry was alive and well, so there’s clearly a disconnect between men and women on the subject.

Men think they are being chivalrous, but women say they just aren’t seeing it in their daily lives or, if they are witnessing it, they’re certainly not seeing enough of it.

It fascinates me that we’ve achieved men not opening doors for women far faster than we’ve achieved equal pay.

In Australia, there’s still a stark 12.1 per cent gender pay gap.

The conversation about chivalry is clearly part of the cultural Zeitgeist at the moment.

A woman in the UK posted a video of herself standing on the train and then filmed a bunch of men sitting while she stood and it amassed millions of views.

She set the clip to Lorde’s song ‘Man of the Year’, which is being used on TikTok at the moment to call out poor behaviour from men.

People online were divided over the clip.

Many saw nothing wrong with men not standing up for women, suggesting that chivalry isn’t a thing anymore.

“I’m confused- are you pregnant? Disabled? Injured? If you aren’t, and they got there first, are total strangers, they don’t owe you a seat,” one person said.

“What’s the issue here?” another asked.

“Men don’t owe women anything,” someone else argued.

However, there were others who claimed the video was proof that “chivalry is dead.”

“And they push you out of the way to get the seats too,” another said.

One woman claimed: “When I was pregnant the same thing happened. Only old ladies would offer to give up the seat.”

The chivalry debate certainly isn’t settled, and at this point, I’d just settle for a grown man not elbowing me to get a better seat on the bus.