Simon the Basset cattle dog sworn in as second honorary dog mayor of NYC following chaotic election

Simon the Bassett cattle dog was sworn in as the second honorary dog mayor in New York City on Sunday afternoon following a whirlwind of an election drowning in bizarre cryptocurrency drama.

“I am grateful, as is Simon, for the opportunity to use this platform for the next two years to promote animal fostering and adoption in New York City as well as to raise awareness and fundraising for all of the amazing organizations on the ground already doing this work,” Sophie Vershbow, Simon’s owner, said at the pup’s inauguration.

Simon was dressed to the nines for his swearing-in ceremony, padding over to the front of City Hall in a winter coat and office tie.

While inaugurating the pup, the city’s Public Advocate Jumaane Williams inserted various dog puns into the typical swearing-in agreement.

“Do you promise to uphold the office of New York City dog mayor with liberty and, yes, dog-mity, for all?” He said before shaking the pup’s paw and completing his ensemble with a top hat.

The dog race to City Hall was inexplicably contentious during this election cycle after cryptocurrency fanatics descended onto the polls and started buying votes to sway favor towards their frontrunner.

The crypto users all backed mayoral candidate Bertram the Pomeranian. The community latched onto the pup and devised a BERT coin, even going to far as to offer financial incentives to buy votes for Bertram.

Because of the negativity, some dogs like Enzo the Shih Tzu were pulled from the competition by their owners, citing the growing negativity. So, the competition wasn’t as stiff, which allowed the dapper Simon to climb in the polls.

Bertram would lose to Simon in early November during one of the final rounds, clinching the election for the hound. Bertram was then appointed Deputy Mayor, but he passed away shortly after the elections wrapped up.

Instead, Pepper the mini chocolate Dachshund was appointed and inaugurated alongside Simon.

Simon will be assuming the duties of retiring dog mayor Sally Long Dog following her inaugural two-year term.

“Sally leaves behind an incredible legacy of activism, and earnestness — and lethargy,” quipped Dog Mayor organizer Stephen Calabria. 

A total of 15 dogs from across the five boroughs participated in the second biannual election.